10 Wellness Resolutions for 2023 You Can Actually Keep

Find out how to achieve your New Year's resolutions. Hint: It's not what you want to change, but how you go about changing it that's the key to success.

By: Kassondra Cloos

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How to Make Better New Year's Resolutions for 2023

It’s time: Time for all the end-of-year reflection stories, your Spotify wrap-up and an influx of newsletters and articles telling you what resolutions you need to make for next year.

Sure, you can make the argument that the best time to start something is always now — not to keep your bad habits till Dec. 31 and try to radically change starting at midnight on New Year’s. But research does show that the start of a new year is a great time to set new goals, says Dr. Laurie Santos, the Yale professor whose the Science of Wellbeing course was such a hit that it led to a free Coursera course and the podcast The Happiness Lab.

Go About Your Goal-Setting the Right Way

“We naturally have these sorts of chapter breaks in life,” Dr. Santos says. “Research shows that we are more motivated to change ourselves in the new year, because it kind of feels like it’s a new chapter, a new page in our lives.”

The key, though, is going about those changes in the right way. “The typical things we pick as resolutions and the way we go about those resolutions, both of those seem to be bad from the perspective of actually increasing our happiness,” Dr. Santos says. Resolutions around changing our bodies or the circumstances of our lives — losing weight, getting a new job or starting a new relationship — don’t actually improve our happiness, she says. Instead, focus on changing your attitude.

Resolve to Exercise, But Not to Look Good or Lose Weight

Let’s start with weight loss goals, as New Year’s is always ripe for diet companies to try to persuade you that they are your secret to happiness. Don’t fall into this trap. Often, people approach body-related goals like, “I would be happier if I had a better bikini body, so I want to lose 10 pounds this year.” But Dr. Santos says that even when people achieve goals like that, they often actually end up more dissatisfied. They expect they’ll suddenly feel better, happier, once those 10 pounds are gone, but they’re still the same person even after losing the weight. If you’re doing it for the wrong reasons, “as soon as you get to the goal you had, you’re like, ‘Oh, I gotta do more,’” she says. “Researchers call this the hedonic treadmill.” A better, healthier way to make body-related goals, she says, is to make a resolution like “I want to move my body every week in a way that feels good.”

Resolve to Journal Every Day

Research shows that journaling regularly can make you both happier and physically healthier. You don’t have to buy a fancy leather-bound notebook for this — you can use whatever’s available to you or make a habit of freewriting in a Word document on your computer every day. Journaling can help you detangle frustrations you’re feeling, keep a record that’s interesting or useful to look back on a few weeks or months from now, and flex your creative muscles. Schedule time on your calendar to remind you to journal at the same time every day, or you could get an app that offers you a different prompt every day.

Learn More : What Is a Bullet Journal?

Resolve to Be More Compassionate With Yourself

How many times have you heard inventors, singers and world-famous authors say that they failed or were rejected a hundred times before they got to where they are now? We often become our own drill sergeants in pursuit of our goals, Dr. Santos says, and that’s not helpful. “That actually mostly makes us afraid of failure and ready to sort of rebel as soon as we get the opportunity,” she says. “Self-compassion actually increases our motivation because we’re not as prone to procrastinate on [our goals].”

Resolve to Try a New Hobby

In the age of Etsy and the gig economy, it can sometimes be hard to do something just because you love it — especially if you work in a creative field where your work is literally your art. But in 2023, resolve to find something you’re passionate about that isn’t going to be your side hustle or turn into an online shop. Maybe it’s getting really into science fiction novels, or watercolor painting, cross-stitching, snail mailing, pogo sticking (can we verb that?), birdwatching, cake decorating, dancing alone in your kitchen, collecting postage stamps, bookbinding, playing chess, film photography, learning a language… you get the idea. Whatever it is, do it because you enjoy it, not because it feels productive.

Resolve to Have Slower Mornings

We all know how easy it is to get sucked into yet another TikTok or text thread or news alert when you want to check “just one more thing” on your phone before bed. When your phone is within arm’s reach, it’s easy to start scrolling in the wee hours of the morning if you wake up unexpectedly and insomnia kicks in. So, turn off your phone entirely and/or put it in a different room an hour or two before you go to bed. Don’t turn it on in the morning until after you’ve had your coffee, tea or breakfast and spent a few quiet moments with yourself without the distractions of the Internet pulling you in 17 different directions.

Resolve to Limit Your News Intake

It’s important to stay informed about what’s going on in your community and world so you can lend your skills or resources to help causes important to you when you’re able. But even though the news cycle is 24-7, your intake of it doesn’t have to be, Dr. Santos says. If you’ve had news fatigue this year, resolve to confine your doomscrolling. “We think if we acknowledge anything good in the world, we won't be able to do that [make meaningful changes],” Dr. Santos says. “But the research suggests just the opposite of that. Taking time to experience gratitude is a strategy you can use to increase your motivation rather than decrease it. It can be a call to action.”

Resolve to Spend Your Screen Time More Intentionally

You probably don’t need a stranger to tell you that 2021 has been rough all around, but just in case, Dr. Santos is here to back that up with research: “A lot more people self-report feeling depressed, anxious and lonely,” she says. So, resolving to limit your screentime in the new year is tricky — it might be the only way you’re able to feel connected with people while you can’t see them in person. But you can approach your devices more intentionally. If you’ve had an entire day of Zoom calls for work, maybe a Zoom happy hour isn’t what you need that day. Resolve to be open and honest about your social needs with your circle of friends and listen to your body when it tells you you need a break from your screens. And if it’s Netflix, Hulu or Disney+ that’s eating all your time? Simple: Take a break. You can always resubscribe later if you really miss them that much.

Learn More : 10 Ways to Fight Anxiety With Easy Self-Care Tips

Resolve to Examine Your Relationships, and How You Engage

To say this year has been tough for our social lives is to put it extremely mildly. As you go into the new year, reflect on whom you've invested the most time with this year, and how that affected you. Could you go for more socially distant walks with friends over FaceTiming them? Were there Zoom social events you attended because you felt like you had to, not because you wanted to? If so, how can you avoid that moving forward? Just because you're at home doesn't mean you have to say yes to every digital invitation you receive. It's OK to put your phone away for a whole weekened even if you're not going anywhere. And it's OK to withdraw from relationships that aren't healthy, too.

Resolve to Express More Gratitude

A seemingly small change that can dramatically improve your wellbeing is simply finding small things to be grateful for every day. Research shows that intentionally expressing gratitude can make us happier, Dr. Santos says, and it can also help us improve the world around us. “There's evidence suggesting that people who are more grateful actually have more willpower, so they're more likely to save for retirement, more likely to eat healthier,” she says. “You’re probably more likely to do the hard things.” So, resolve to keep a gratitude journal, send more handwritten thank you cards or even just share three little things you’re grateful for each day in a text to a friend.

Resolve to Go for a Walk Every Day

You don’t necessarily have to live near a national park to have meaningful time outdoors. Even if it’s just for a quick stroll around the block, resolve to make time for regular phone-free walks to give your brain a break and get your body moving. Even if you’ve lived in the same house for 30 years, you’re likely to spot something new you’ve never noticed before if you really open your eyes to what’s around you, which is good fodder for the next resolution: journal every day.

P.S. Here's one thing that changes every single day, even if you're certain you've already seen it all: the light. Try waking up before dawn to see how the early morning glow casts different shadows around your neighborhood, or challenge yourself to find the best sunset vantage point in your community.